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STICKY:
A Simple Thank You
(Preview)
Hello Everyone, As the founder and webmaster of Miracles In Progress I want to extent a personal "Thank You" to each of you for valuing and utilizing the CoDA portion of our site. As we grow in our recoveries from alcoholism, addiction, or being a family member of a loved one who suffers from this di...
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John
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14
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4985
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Book Study: Codependent No More - Chapter 14
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Anger "What is it about me you hate so much?" a man asked his wife six months into his sobriety. "Everything!" she replied with a glare. Everyone feels anger. Sometimes we work through it quickly and move on. Codependents tend to just stay angry. We may feel guilty for it and n...
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willing
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3
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32
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In This Moment, I have spirituality.
(Preview)
My life was unmanageable. I had no goals, no insights. I struggled with decision-making. Before CoDA, I had religion. Now, I have spirituality which sustains me on a daily basis. I have a Higher Power to guide, support, & listen to me. My spirituality & Higher Power have lifted a great burden...
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lilmzsparkles
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1
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18
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How to find a therapist
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I am codependent. I am 48 years old and I discovered that there was a name for this about 3 years ago. I always thought it was a term reserved for those from alcoholic families. In my family it did not stem from alcoholism, but a hypercritical environment with a father with an explosive temper. I thou...
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mime
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3
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36
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In This Moment, I'm God's child.
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I'm beautiful as is. I don't need to change to please the world. I continue to grow, at my own pace, in peace & understanding. I am no longer lost as before. Now, I have a Fellowship which understands & cares about me. I can talk things over with my sponsor. I don't have to face my feelings alone. I h...
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lilmzsparkles
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0
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11
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how does one stay in a long term relationship when things become difficult?
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I'm in a 15 year relationship that is going backwards. It is causing me a lot of guilt because I entertain ideas of leaving or taking a break. We never lived together for a few reasons and money is a big one. We couldn't afford to live together. We both met having our own apartments and I was not and am n...
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lori4nn
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4
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118
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ITM, I let go of past negative beliefs.
(Preview)
My negativity used to stop me from loving myself & others. Now, when old beliefs creep into my thoughts, I remember the work I did in Step4. I remind myself of how much I've grown in recovery. I stop, own my behaviour, & make positive changes. Through experiencing change, I know in my heart that...
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lilmzsparkles
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0
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29
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Changing - One Day at a Time
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I have been thinking about this topic for a while and thought I would put it out here and see if it catches on. I would like to focus on what is changing in our lives in regards to our learning to focus on ourselves. How are we controlling others less and ourselves more? How are we taking care of ourselves?...
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willing
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4
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76
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Distance in Relationships (Avoidance Pattern)
(Preview)
Hi, I am fascinated by the Recovery Patterns of codependence. I am amazed at how many of them describe my own behaviors. For my contribution to an active forum, I will post a different pattern of codependency every few days. I encourage everyone to share on each topic. Sharing will help us all....
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nice4ever
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11
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220
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In This Moment, I am alone.
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That's ok. It's God's plan for me. I grew up surrounded by people yet felt lonely. Now I can grow up emotionally & spiritually. I'm re-parenting myself by meeting my own needs. That means being the best me I can be. No more people-pleasing to gain acceptance. No more lies & cover-ups to meet som...
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lilmzsparkles
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5
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106
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In This Moment, gratitude works.
(Preview)
A few years ago, I read a book that said the best prayer is a gratitude prayer. Since that day, my prayers always start with, "Thank you, God." It works! When I lost my job. I started a daily prayer thanking God for the new job I knew would come. Despite my being unemployed, I had serenity becaus...
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lilmzsparkles
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0
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22
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ITM, I mind my own business.
(Preview)
I'm grateful for the CoDA program. I've learned that by allowing others to live their own lives, I have the time & energy to tend to my own affairs. I once thought I was helping others by doing things for them. I gave them a silent message that I thought they weren't capable of doing for themselves. I g...
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lilmzsparkles
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1
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32
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In This Moment, I am growing.
(Preview)
I feel pain & work on letting it go. My life has taken on new energy & I see a bright future. Recognising triggers has been a huge part of my growth. Instead of walking into a situation that will bring more pain, I make different choices. I change my thoughts as well. I know I am being healed as the pa...
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lilmzsparkles
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2
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42
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hurting need insight
(Preview)
My husband of 9 years, first 4+ drinking last 4+ sober told me I drove him away, made him feel beat down and that i was too controlling, he left after feeling this way for 2 years but never talking to me about it, always saying it was work or sobriety or something unrelating to me. I am in shock, i am greiving...
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RachelBlue
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1
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48
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Now that my wife is recently sober I find myself angry
(Preview)
My wife has finally become sober for the last couple months, from being addicted to painkillers for two years. Now that she is sober, I am not focusing on putting out the fire.. meaning stoppingthe drug use, the money spending and trying to get her into a program. Now that she is there, I guess I find mys...
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pappasmurf
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2
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52
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Being Present
(Preview)
I just went on a wonderful vacation and it seemed to have a theme, which usually happens without any effort. The theme for me was "being present". We put a lot of miles on the car and went to so many fantastic places. I would often remind myself to be present. Stop. Smell, feel, experience...
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willing
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4
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102
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Book Study: Codependent No More - Chapter 2
(Preview)
Chapter 2: Other Stories There are many different types of codependents and the first story is of Gerald. Successful in school, socially, and in business, Gerald seemed to be horrible at relationships. Shortly after college he married Rita and stayed married to her for 13 years despite the fact s...
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Linistea
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5
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450
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In This Moment, I feel young.
(Preview)
I am so thankful for my attitude in life. My faith in my Higher Power keeps my spirit young. I believe in the healing powers of my daily affirmations. I haven't outgrown the curiosity of my youth. My curiosity led me to CoDA. Today, it is a joy in my life. I love the people I see there every week. They love &am...
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lilmzsparkles
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0
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17
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In This Moment, I must speak.
(Preview)
It breaks my heart to take a stand that I fear will create turmoil. Yet, I must speak. Denying the truth has far worse consequences. Wellness for me is dependent on my ability to be honest. I am deeply grateful that I have a program which values honesty. By being true to myself, I can expect a miraculous ch...
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lilmzsparkles
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20
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I'm Hurting Bad!!!!!!
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Today I went to pick up my daughter she is 15 years old and she told me that she did not want to go with me. Her mother was smiling as this was going on. My daughter was crying. Mom and I have not been together for 10 years. It hurt me soooo much to hear my daughter say this. She is not doing well in school and I kno...
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Sad One
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5
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80
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In This Moment, I am spiritual.
(Preview)
When my spirit is in harmony with life, I am renewed & refreshed with affirmation & wisdom. I have freedom to live without limitations & strength to bear all things. I am unique & precious. A surge of gladness travels throughout my being. I have hope for that which I thought I could not...
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lilmzsparkles
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1
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31
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My trip - Love and Inner peace
(Preview)
Hello all, How did you overcome your need for drama? I'm only experiencing it when it comes to close or romantic relationships. It's seems the only thing that's giving me a high enough that feeds my hunger for feelings, for love, for happiness, for acceptance, for safety. It's a great high but it's...
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funny_face
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1
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55
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ITM, I am deeply grateful to CoDA.
(Preview)
CoDA offers me a safe space & the tools necessary to begin the healing process of recovery. Not every day is peaceful. Many are painful as I face & feel the frozen feelings from my past. Through an evolving recovery process, I gain ability to make & maintain healthy loving relationships,...
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lilmzsparkles
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0
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25
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Book Study: Codependent No More - Chapter 1
(Preview)
The first chapter starts as it should, someone telling their story so we can identify. This was Jessica's story. A 32 year old woman married to an alcoholic. Jessica tells of her inability to function in life anymore. The depression - the lack of will to do even the smallest things like showering....
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Linistea
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12
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705
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relationships
(Preview)
Hi, In the last day or so, I have acknowledged that a large portion of my day has been spent worrying about others. I am also seeing and feeling the difference this awareness has made. It seems my life has been focused on other people, leaving very little time to take care of the needs of myself and my chil...
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Tracey C
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2
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109
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ITM, I'm learning who I am.
(Preview)
No feelings were expressed at home when I was a child. I learned not to feel. I developed ways to keep my feelings down. I'd get depressed instead of angry, anxious instead of scared or sad or over-eat. Now I'm learning it's ok to feel but it's still hard. If I feel depressed & anxious I still want to bi...
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lilmzsparkles
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1
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41
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What do I do with this? Need help
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After 9+years of marriage to a "functional" alcoholic he seems to be a new man. I won't go into the long ugly history now but his recovery started when I had an "exit affair" 6 months ago. My affair devastated me and it has been difficult to come to grips with. On the other hand he say...
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upintheair22
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5
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150
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In This Moment, I am healing.
(Preview)
I am a recovering codependent. I'm not stuck or doomed to be hopeless & helpless, forever repeating codependent patterns. I'm growing. I don't need to be "fixed". I transform my past hurt & pain into gifts of deeper understanding & empathy. I have hope for my future. What a gi...
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lilmzsparkles
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0
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46
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My trip- Boundaries
(Preview)
Hello every one, I am really enjoying my progress, my trip. This post is about boundaries, something as ALANON and Co-dependents have been trained NOT to have. We were repeatedly taught that our person is second best and our feelings don't matter. Therefore learning to set boundaries is about v...
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funny_face
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2
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77
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In This Moment, I ask for help.
(Preview)
Asking for help used to be so hard. I never asked. I didn't want to depend on anyone for fear they may let me down or refuse to help me. I couldn't risk it. I felt too vulnerable. In recovery, I can ask for help, first from my Higher Power & then from other people. I trust that help is available. I am no long...
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lilmzsparkles
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0
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33
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