|
Daily Meditation ~ When the Time is Right
(Preview)
There are times when we simply do not know what to do, or where to go, next. Sometimes these periods are brief, sometimes lingering. We can get through these times. We can rely on our program and the disciplines of recovery. We can cope by using our faith, other people, and our resources. Accept uncerta...
|
lilmzsparkles
|
0
|
403
|
|
|
|
Self interest first (Compliance Pattern)
(Preview)
Hi, I am fascinated by the Recovery Patterns of codependence. I am amazed at how many of them describe my own behaviors. For my contribution to an active forum, I will post a different pattern of codependency every few days. I encourage everyone to share on each topic. Sharing will help us all. ...
|
nice4ever
|
1
|
514
|
|
|
|
Daily Meditation ~ Surrender
(Preview)
Surrender means saying, "Okay, God. I'll do whatever You want." Faith in the God of our recovery means we trust that, eventually, we'll like doing that. Today, I will surrender to my Higher Power. I'll trust that God's plan for me will be good, even if it is different than I hoped for or expec...
|
lilmzsparkles
|
4
|
631
|
|
|
|
Daily Meditation ~ Back to the Steps
(Preview)
Go back to the Steps. Go back to a Step When we don't know what to do next, when we feel confused, upset, distraught, at the end of our rope, overwhelmed, full of self will, rage, or despair, go back to the Steps. No matter what situation we are facing, working a Step will help. Focus on one, trust your insti...
|
lilmzsparkles
|
1
|
398
|
|
|
|
Step Work Board Info
(Preview)
http://stepwork.activeboard.comHi Fellow Codies! :)We are working on bringing our Step Work Board to the forefront of this site again. This is where newcomers can learn about each of the 12 steps and old timers can share their experience, strength and hope related to them.This week we are star...
|
John
|
0
|
612
|
|
|
|
Daily Meditation ~ We Can Trust Ourselves
(Preview)
For many of us, the issue is not whether we can trust another person again; it's whether we can trust our own judgment again. "The last mistake I made almost cost me my sanity," said one recovering woman who married a sex addict. "I can't afford to make another mistake like that."...
|
lilmzsparkles
|
0
|
542
|
|
|
|
Daily Meditation ~ Awareness
(Preview)
When we first become aware of a problem, a situation, or a feeling, we may react with anxiety or fear. There is no need to fear awareness. No need. Awareness is the first step toward positive change and growth. It's the first step toward solving the problem, or getting the need met, the first step toward...
|
lilmzsparkles
|
1
|
399
|
|
|
|
Daily Meditation ~ The Magic of Gratitude & Acceptance
(Preview)
Gratitude and acceptance are two magic tricks available to us in recovery. No matter who we are, where we are, or what we have, gratitude and acceptance work. We may eventually become so happy that we realize our present circumstances are good. Or we master our present circumstances and then move for...
|
lilmzsparkles
|
4
|
592
|
|
|
|
Daily Meditation ~ Being Gentle with Ourselves During Times of Grief
(Preview)
The process of adapting to change and loss takes energy. Grief is draining, sometimes exhausting. Some people need to "cocoon for transformation," in Pat Carnes's words, while going through grief. We may feel more tired than usual. Our ability to function well in other areas of our life...
|
lilmzsparkles
|
4
|
979
|
|
|
|
Daily Meditation ~ Taking Care of Ourselves
(Preview)
It's healthy, wise, and loving to be considerate and responsive to the feelings and needs of others. That's different from caretaking. Caretaking is a self defeating and, certainly, a relationship defeating behavior - a behavior that backfires and can cause us to feel resentful and victimized - b...
|
lilmzsparkles
|
7
|
546
|
|
|
|
Daily Meditation ~ Accepting Our Feelings
(Preview)
Why do we struggle so with our feelings? Why do we work so hard to deny our emotions, especially concerning other people? They are only feelings! In the course of a day, we may deny we feel frustrated in reaction to someone who is selling us a service. We may deny that we feel frustrated, angry, or hurt in r...
|
lilmzsparkles
|
2
|
557
|
|
|
|
Negative Labeling of Others (Denial Pattern)
(Preview)
Hi, I am fascinated by the Recovery Patterns of codependence. I am amazed at how many of them describe my own behaviors. For my contribution to an active forum, I will post a different pattern of codependency every few days. I encourage everyone to share on each topic. Sharing will help us all. T...
|
nice4ever
|
3
|
646
|
|
|
|
Daily Meditation ~ Grief & Action
(Preview)
Trust in God and do something. —Mary Lyon It's important to let ourselves grieve as a passage between yesterday and tomorrow. But we do not have to be controlled unduly by our grief, or our pain. There are times when we have grieved, surrendered to the heaviness, tiredness, and weariness of a circums...
|
lilmzsparkles
|
2
|
675
|
|
|
|
Daily Meditation ~ True to Ourselves
(Preview)
This above all: to thine own self be true, and it must follow, as the night the day, thou 'canst not then be false to any man. —William Shakespeare To thine own self be true. A grounding statement for those of us who get caught up in the storm of needs and feelings of others. Listen to the self. What do we nee...
|
lilmzsparkles
|
3
|
633
|
|
|
|
No Need for Approval (Low Self-esteem pattern)
(Preview)
Hi, I am fascinated by the Recovery Patterns of codependence. I am amazed at how many of them describe my own behaviors. John (founder of MIP) has requested more activity on this CoDA board. For my contribution, every few days, I will post a different pattern of codependency. I encourage everyo...
|
nice4ever
|
13
|
1386
|
|
|
|
Daily Meditation ~ Detaching with Love
(Preview)
Sometimes people we love do things we don't like or approve of. We react. They react. Before long, we're all reacting to each other, and the problem escalates. When do we detach? When we're hooked into a reaction of anger, fear, guilt, or shame. When we get hooked into a power play - an attempt to control...
|
lilmzsparkles
|
3
|
1207
|
|
|
|
balance
(Preview)
I am a little confused. In the past I saw the good in everyone. I made excuses for unnacceptable behaviour i could always see why someone did some thing, they had a bad childhood, they were in pain, they were sick;. This lead me to recovery I never had boudaries and did not know how to take care of me. My se...
|
tracy
|
2
|
434
|
|
|
|
Daily Meditation ~ Acceptance
(Preview)
A magical potion is available to us today. That potion is called acceptance. We are asked to accept many things: ourselves, as we are; our feelings, needs, desires, choices, and current status of being. Other people, as they are. The status of our relationships with them. Problems. Blessings. Fina...
|
lilmzsparkles
|
5
|
744
|
|
|
|
Happy Birthday, Leandra!!! XXXXXX
(Preview)
WoW!!! SSSsshhhhhhh..... Is it really your 60th!!!!! Beautiful age of fulfillment, I hope :D A decade of love, blooming & the best to come as you so rightfully deserve. Have a gorgeous day being good to you & know you are loved, loving & lovable! Never alone again, Sister :) Yours in recov...
|
lilmzsparkles
|
4
|
670
|
|
|
|
I have a question
(Preview)
Hello everyone. As you can tell I am such a newbie to alanon. I don't see many people asking questions in this group but I think that it is probably fine to do so? I have been attending alanon for about 3 months and I have really enjoyed it. I have learned so much and I am getting ready to start working the s...
|
daisy31
|
5
|
752
|
|
|
|
Daily Meditation ~ Let's Make a Deal
(Preview)
The relationship just wasn't working out, and I wanted it to so badly. I kept thinking if I just made myself look prettier, if I just tried to be a more loving, kind person, then he would love me. I turned myself inside out to be something better, when all along, who I was was okay. I just couldn't see what I w...
|
lilmzsparkles
|
3
|
394
|
|
|
|
Decisions without regard to the consequences (Compliance Pattern)
(Preview)
Hi, I am fascinated by the Recovery Patterns of codependence. I am amazed at how many of them describe my own behaviors. John (founder of MIP) has requested more activity on this CoDA board. For my contribution, every few days, I will post a different pattern of codependency. I encourage every...
|
nice4ever
|
3
|
1592
|
|
|
|
Daily Meditation ~ Anger
(Preview)
Feeling angry - and, sometimes, the act of blaming - is a natural and necessary part of accepting loss and change - of grieving. We can allow ourselves and others to become angry as we move from denial toward acceptance. As we come to terms with loss and change, we may blame our higher Power, others, or ou...
|
lilmzsparkles
|
1
|
411
|
|
|
|
service in Alanon
(Preview)
Hi I've just found you... so i thought I'd explain why I feel I need Coda. I have been using Alanon properly since around 2003. At first I absorbed it all like a sponge. My husband was still active then and I was a mess. I found it hard to accept help but it also knew it was help that i needed. So all good so far lo...
|
odaat
|
4
|
697
|
|
|
|
Daily Meditation ~ The Grief Process
(Preview)
To let ourselves wholly grieve our losses is how we surrender to the process of life and recovery. Some experts, like Patrick Carnes, call the Twelve Steps "a program for dealing with our losses, a program for dealing with our grief." How do we grieve? Awkwardly. Imperfectly. Usually wit...
|
lilmzsparkles
|
1
|
573
|
|
|
|
Daily Meditation ~ Transformation Through Grief
(Preview)
We're striving for acceptance in recovery - acceptance of our past, other people, our present circumstances, and ourselves. Acceptance brings peace, healing, and freedom - the freedom to take care of ourselves. Acceptance is not a one step process. Before we achieve acceptance, we go toward it in...
|
lilmzsparkles
|
1
|
631
|
|
|
|
when does self caring become selfish?
(Preview)
When does self caring become selfish.....? I have an illness that people don't see......and therefore either people don't accept it or don't remember it's there..... I have CFS and fibromyalgia, and cervical spondylosis. I keep alot of the symptoms at bay through an avoidance diet. If I have dai...
|
odaat
|
4
|
585
|
|
|
|
Daily Meditation ~ Opening Ourselves to Love
(Preview)
Open ourselves to the love that is available to us. We do not have to limit our sources of love. God and the Universe have an unlimited supply of what we need, including love. When we are open to receiving love, we will begin to receive it. It may come from the most surprising places, including from within...
|
lilmzsparkles
|
4
|
753
|
|
|
|
Help & Advice (Control Pattern)
(Preview)
Hi, I am fascinated by the Recovery Patterns of codependence. I am amazed at how many of them describe my own behaviors. For my contribution to this forum, every few days, I will post a different pattern of codependency. I encourage everyone to share on each topic. Sharing will help us all. Than...
|
nice4ever
|
2
|
595
|
|
|
|
Daily Meditation ~ Step Eleven
(Preview)
Sought through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with God, as we understood Him, praying only for knowledge of His will for us and the power to carry that out. —Step Eleven of Al Anon "... praying only for knowledge of His will for us and the power to carry that out" mean...
|
lilmzsparkles
|
3
|
588
|
|
|