It's important to let ourselves grieve as a passage between yesterday and tomorrow. But we do not have to be controlled unduly by our grief, or our pain.
There are times when we have grieved, surrendered to the heaviness, tiredness, and weariness of a circumstance long enough. It becomes time to break out. It comes time to take action.
We will know when it's time to break the routine of grieving. There will be signs within and around us. We will become tired of the heaviness. An idea will occur; an opportunity will present itself. We may think: No. Too much effort... Do it anyway. Try something. Reach out. Stretch. Do something unusual, something different, and something special.
A new activity may help trigger the transformation process. Stay up two hours later than usual! Make an appointment to do something for yourself that is different from what you usually do. Visit someone you haven't seen in years. Do something to encourage and help the new energy coming your way.
We may not feel like breaking out of grief. It may feel safer, easier, to remain in our cocoon. Begin pushing out anyway.
Test the walls of your cocoon. Push. Push a little harder. It may be time to emerge.
Today, I will trust God and the process, but I will also take action to help myself feel better.
Grief and action is the lesson I've learned over the last couple of weeks. I've had think about where this grief is and who or what it is directed at.....
I had been blaming my alcoholic husband......an easy target..... and thought he was being a dry drunk. But the reality of it is I was grieving for the loss of my daughters easy life....and she heads into such a huge responsibility alone. I was angry at the man who has put her in thi position.
But teasing out what is ACTUALLY going on instead of reacting to what I had DECIDED was going on has allowed me to come to terms with this situation and to deal with it in a more healthy way.
I CAN trust that God is in this process and IS looking after my daughter. As I step back and stop trying to force solutions and stop trying to think up a different, easier set of consequences....I've found I can enjoy my daughter more....and my husband....who is worried and grieving too.
