Miracles In Progress Codependents Anonymous Group - Miracles In Progress Codependents Anonymous Group

lilmzsparkles · lilmzsparkles

Controversy & conflict are things I often preferred to avoid. Working through these uncomfortable feelings, I've learned there are healthy ways to address issues. If I don't like how meetings are held, literature is distributed or monies spent, I can ask for & join in group conscience. Th...

lilmzsparkles · lilmzsparkles

I never thought to make amends to myself while looking into a mirror, as the CoDA book suggests. When I looked in a mirror, I saw a person, but I never saw myself. A fellowship friend mentioned doing a 5th Step in the mirror. When I did, I touched some of my self-abandonment, self-neglect, & self-abu...

lilmzsparkles · lilmzsparkles

In my childhood, breaches of trust seriously impacted my self-esteem & ability to trust my gut instincts. I grew up thinking I must trust automatically. When others broke my trust, I was confused & upset. I wondered what I had done wrong to cause them to be dishonest. I know now I'm not respons...

tracy · tracy

Hi all, not sure what I am going to say just letting it flow. I have been seperated from my ABF for 2 months he has been in AA for 3 years slipping and sliding. When he egts on a programme and never needed me as much I semmed to get scker. All my hope used to crash when he was ill I had dreams that one day he would g...

lilmzsparkles · lilmzsparkles

Lots of times I focus on other people's faults. It's easier than facing my own. Today, I'm taking my own inventory. Often, I find it hard to speak up for myself. I let others control me. I've put their peace of mind ahead of mine. My peace of mind is important to me. I have to do what's best for me. I have said,...

mime · mime

Last week I was driving with my boyfriend, we were going out to dinner. During the drive, he took a call from the partner of one of his employees, whom he apparently told to leave the job at noon that day because he was not doing the job. After he left the job, the guy went out on a binge, which is why his gf wa...

lilmzsparkles · lilmzsparkles

I share my feelings & experiences with others. I pick up the phone & call my sponsor or another person in recovery. Someone else may have gone through a similar experience & understand what I'm going through. Often, I do not need advice; I just need to be heard. I am responsible for my own li...

lilmzsparkles · lilmzsparkles

My boundary has been violated. What do I do? It took all my courage to set it. I spent hours in groups to find the courage to state it. I found my power. I spoke my truth. I stated my limit. I trusted God. Now, someone is stomping all over it. Can I stand my ground? This is a test: Can I defend my boundary now I've...

willing · willing

In AA they recommend that folks don't hang around their drinking friends anymore. Change your environment. It is so true for me. Who I have in my life makes such a huge difference. The healthier I become, the more I am of service, the healthier people I attract. I mean AMAZING people that live their...

Tracey C · Tracey C

Hi.This morning I woke from a deep sleep, with the sudden realisation, that I am where I am because of me. Not from anyone/anything else. Soley from the choices I have made for my life. In the Laundry List book Step 5 reads - We admitted to our Higher Power, To Ourselves and to another human being the ex...

lilmzsparkles · lilmzsparkles

I remove toxic people, situations, substances, & behaviours from my life. I replace the old messages with new, supportive, healthy ones. I develop new behaviours that nurture my growth. I listen to my feelings & use them as a tool & guide. I choose to change as I no longer wish to repeat th...

lilmzsparkles · lilmzsparkles

When I'm scared, upset or confused, I remember I'm not helpless or alone. I'm not a victim. As I hadn't learned healthy conflict resolution & experienced emotional neglect, I came to doubt I could take care of myself. Learning to trust is a process. As I attend meetings & work the 12 Steps with...

lilmzsparkles · lilmzsparkles

When I was new in the program, I called my sponsor to complain. She replied with one word: Expectations. My unrealistic expectations of someone's behaviour caused turmoil. Sometimes it was caused by unrealistic expectations of my own behaviour. People are who they are & do what they do. I'm not...

lilmzsparkles · lilmzsparkles

I am the sum of all my yesterdays. I am this moment's thoughts, actions, & feelings. I relish being in the moment. I thank my Higher Power for leading me to the program & showing me a path out of insanity. The love I feel for myself & others fills my heart & soul. I am enough. CoDA Daily Medi...

tangela · tangela

I just lost a great job because I could not be assertive, was people pleasing and shying away from confrontation. From reading about codependency, these are all manifestations of codependency...or they are all related somehow. THis is my first posting; i have not yet gone to a CODA meeting; there...

tracy · tracy

I have just been reading the daily meditation on meloney beaties site. You are responsible for yourself. I am trying hard to have compassion for myself to realsie I did the best with what I Knew. I know why I always felt responsible for other yet did not own my own power. I am just so sick in the stomache...

lilmzsparkles · lilmzsparkles

I am here. I notice all the gifts around me that my Higher Power places in my life. I slow down enough to see all the bright colours in my surroundings. I do not judge whether things "should" or "should not" be. When it rains, I let the raindrops fall on my face & experience them f...

lilmzsparkles · lilmzsparkles

The committee in my head shouts I'm unworthy, inadequate, not good enough. It's replaying dialogue from the past. The committee is old; it's been there for a long time. I think it's time it retired. I'm replacing it with positive affirmations. I have CoDA's affirmation booklet on my nightstand. Eve...

Tracey C · Tracey C

Hi, I've been reading a book called The Laundry List by Tony A. This is an adult child of alcoholics book. In there under the subject of fixing others there's a sentence which reads - "In ACOA I had to learn to let others feel troubled, depressed, miserable, lost or fearful without rushing over a...

tracy · tracy

we have recently started doing some work in a step group and I AM SO GLAD I am committing to doing this work even if it i really hard to look in the mirror. I feel really focused and feel like I am really getting to know me the good and the bad. just got to remember to hold Hps hand and not wack my self with a sti...

lilmzsparkles · lilmzsparkles

I hate making mistakes. I try to do things "right," but when I'm in a mess of my own making, I feel devastated. I used to try to cover up, deny it, or punish myself (before anyone else did). Now, I've a better choice. I practice Step10 & admit it. I made a mistake, but I'm still OK. I accept my i...

lilmzsparkles · lilmzsparkles

Negative thinking ran in the family. Whatever the situation, I could imagine the worst outcome. On a sunny day a single cloud meant rain, if called to the office, I'd get fired. At first in CoDA my finances got worse. I imagined being homeless. Then God changed my thinking. I began to look for things to b...

lilmzsparkles · lilmzsparkles

I lift my head, look around, & see a beautiful fuchsia colour on the cover of a notebook. I like that. I look out the window & see the bright green in some new spring grass. Wow! I like that. I see my children all cozy & asleep, peaceful & trusting. My Higher Power put these little people &a...

lilmzsparkles · lilmzsparkles

Right now, I'm taking a moment to stop my visual pinball reactions to life. I'm pausing to reflect on where I am. I feel my feelings. Gratitude for the tool of self-awareness, knowing I can own my power. I stop to check in with myself & see what's up or what's down. I know it's all OK. If I'm here for myse...

lilmzsparkles · lilmzsparkles

After ten years of recovery, I am in pain again. I need to do another Fourth Step inventory. Out comes the pen & paper. Out comes anger, pain, & resentments. And finally, out come some character defects I have worn like armour all my life. How could I be so blind? Talking to my sponsor helps me rea...

lilmzsparkles · lilmzsparkles

Part of me wants to stay in bed. What if I can imagine how it is to wake up happy, joyous & free. Oh! What a gift that would be. Yet here I am just lying here, a little down & tired of the same old same old. Hey! Snap out of it! The sun is coming up, the birds are singing, the breeze is gently rustling the le...

Tracey C · Tracey C

This is another article in the coda newsletter. Apparently it was taken from AA Reviver March 2004. Listening - When I ask you to listen to me, and you start giving advice, you have not done what I asked. - When I ask you to listen and you begin to tell me why I shouldn't feel that wa...

Dr Venkman · Dr Venkman

Greetings everyone. My mid-teenage daughter is flunking two classes in high school - both are grad pre-requisites. She shrinks when ever presented with a challenge. I've been extremely hard on her about her grades since she was in sixth grade - downright abusive and mean. She won't talk to me ab...

lilmzsparkles · lilmzsparkles

When I find myself struggling to be who I am, I think back to when I first came to CoDA. I believed I had no character faults. I grew up being whatever everyone else wanted me to be. I had no sense of who I was. When I read CoDA's patterns of codependency in denial, low self-esteem, & control, I knew I was &...

lilmzsparkles · lilmzsparkles

Doing a 4th Step is like peeling an onion, a layer at a time. Before program, I excused my character defects as "just who I am." I've now worked two 4th Step inventories. Early in recovery, I couldn't see the defects I recognise today. Likewise, there are defects I'm not ready to see today. Th...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	ITM, I recognise that conflict can be good. (Preview) Controversy & conflict are things I often preferred to avoid. Working through these uncomfortable feelings, I've learned there are healthy ways to address issues. If I don't like how meetings are held, literature is distributed or monies spent, I can ask for & join in group conscience. Th...	lilmzsparkles	1	440	Apr 30, 2012 by willing
	ITM, I look in the mirror & see myself. (Preview) I never thought to make amends to myself while looking into a mirror, as the CoDA book suggests. When I looked in a mirror, I saw a person, but I never saw myself. A fellowship friend mentioned doing a 5th Step in the mirror. When I did, I touched some of my self-abandonment, self-neglect, & self-abu...	lilmzsparkles	0	346	Apr 28, 2012 by lilmzsparkles
	In This Moment, I trust myself. (Preview) In my childhood, breaches of trust seriously impacted my self-esteem & ability to trust my gut instincts. I grew up thinking I must trust automatically. When others broke my trust, I was confused & upset. I wondered what I had done wrong to cause them to be dishonest. I know now I'm not respons...	lilmzsparkles	0	363	Apr 27, 2012 by lilmzsparkles
	my disease (Preview) Hi all, not sure what I am going to say just letting it flow. I have been seperated from my ABF for 2 months he has been in AA for 3 years slipping and sliding. When he egts on a programme and never needed me as much I semmed to get scker. All my hope used to crash when he was ill I had dreams that one day he would g...	tracy	3	607	Apr 27, 2012 by tracy
	ITM, I take my inventory. (Preview) Lots of times I focus on other people's faults. It's easier than facing my own. Today, I'm taking my own inventory. Often, I find it hard to speak up for myself. I let others control me. I've put their peace of mind ahead of mine. My peace of mind is important to me. I have to do what's best for me. I have said,...	lilmzsparkles	0	386	Apr 26, 2012 by lilmzsparkles
	One very tiny victory (Preview) Last week I was driving with my boyfriend, we were going out to dinner. During the drive, he took a call from the partner of one of his employees, whom he apparently told to leave the job at noon that day because he was not doing the job. After he left the job, the guy went out on a binge, which is why his gf wa...	mime	3	398	Apr 26, 2012 by mime
	ITM, I reach out for help. (Preview) I share my feelings & experiences with others. I pick up the phone & call my sponsor or another person in recovery. Someone else may have gone through a similar experience & understand what I'm going through. Often, I do not need advice; I just need to be heard. I am responsible for my own li...	lilmzsparkles	0	316	Apr 25, 2012 by lilmzsparkles
	ITM, I stand my ground. (Preview) My boundary has been violated. What do I do? It took all my courage to set it. I spent hours in groups to find the courage to state it. I found my power. I spoke my truth. I stated my limit. I trusted God. Now, someone is stomping all over it. Can I stand my ground? This is a test: Can I defend my boundary now I've...	lilmzsparkles	0	342	Apr 24, 2012 by lilmzsparkles
	Amazing Stuff (Preview) In AA they recommend that folks don't hang around their drinking friends anymore. Change your environment. It is so true for me. Who I have in my life makes such a huge difference. The healthier I become, the more I am of service, the healthier people I attract. I mean AMAZING people that live their...	willing	3	467	Apr 23, 2012 by willing
	Acoa related (Preview) Hi.This morning I woke from a deep sleep, with the sudden realisation, that I am where I am because of me. Not from anyone/anything else. Soley from the choices I have made for my life. In the Laundry List book Step 5 reads - We admitted to our Higher Power, To Ourselves and to another human being the ex...	Tracey C	2	431	Apr 24, 2012 by willing
	ITM, I choose self-worth. (Preview) I remove toxic people, situations, substances, & behaviours from my life. I replace the old messages with new, supportive, healthy ones. I develop new behaviours that nurture my growth. I listen to my feelings & use them as a tool & guide. I choose to change as I no longer wish to repeat th...	lilmzsparkles	0	346	Apr 23, 2012 by lilmzsparkles
	In This Moment, I gain trust. (Preview) When I'm scared, upset or confused, I remember I'm not helpless or alone. I'm not a victim. As I hadn't learned healthy conflict resolution & experienced emotional neglect, I came to doubt I could take care of myself. Learning to trust is a process. As I attend meetings & work the 12 Steps with...	lilmzsparkles	0	362	Apr 22, 2012 by lilmzsparkles
	ITM, I let go of expectations. (Preview) When I was new in the program, I called my sponsor to complain. She replied with one word: Expectations. My unrealistic expectations of someone's behaviour caused turmoil. Sometimes it was caused by unrealistic expectations of my own behaviour. People are who they are & do what they do. I'm not...	lilmzsparkles	0	383	Apr 20, 2012 by lilmzsparkles
	In This Moment, I am enough. (Preview) I am the sum of all my yesterdays. I am this moment's thoughts, actions, & feelings. I relish being in the moment. I thank my Higher Power for leading me to the program & showing me a path out of insanity. The love I feel for myself & others fills my heart & soul. I am enough. CoDA Daily Medi...	lilmzsparkles	0	311	Apr 20, 2012 by lilmzsparkles
	People Pleasing, can i take your pain away (Preview) I just lost a great job because I could not be assertive, was people pleasing and shying away from confrontation. From reading about codependency, these are all manifestations of codependency...or they are all related somehow. THis is my first posting; i have not yet gone to a CODA meeting; there...	tangela	3	866	Apr 20, 2012 by lilmzsparkles
	AHHH moment (Preview) I have just been reading the daily meditation on meloney beaties site. You are responsible for yourself. I am trying hard to have compassion for myself to realsie I did the best with what I Knew. I know why I always felt responsible for other yet did not own my own power. I am just so sick in the stomache...	tracy	2	421	Apr 20, 2012 by lilmzsparkles
	In This Moment, I am present. (Preview) I am here. I notice all the gifts around me that my Higher Power places in my life. I slow down enough to see all the bright colours in my surroundings. I do not judge whether things "should" or "should not" be. When it rains, I let the raindrops fall on my face & experience them f...	lilmzsparkles	0	343	Apr 20, 2012 by lilmzsparkles
	ITM, I choose not to listen. (Preview) The committee in my head shouts I'm unworthy, inadequate, not good enough. It's replaying dialogue from the past. The committee is old; it's been there for a long time. I think it's time it retired. I'm replacing it with positive affirmations. I have CoDA's affirmation booklet on my nightstand. Eve...	lilmzsparkles	0	332	Apr 18, 2012 by lilmzsparkles
	Fixing Others (Preview) Hi, I've been reading a book called The Laundry List by Tony A. This is an adult child of alcoholics book. In there under the subject of fixing others there's a sentence which reads - "In ACOA I had to learn to let others feel troubled, depressed, miserable, lost or fearful without rushing over a...	Tracey C	1	460	Apr 18, 2012 by willing
	step work (Preview) we have recently started doing some work in a step group and I AM SO GLAD I am committing to doing this work even if it i really hard to look in the mirror. I feel really focused and feel like I am really getting to know me the good and the bad. just got to remember to hold Hps hand and not wack my self with a sti...	tracy	2	411	Apr 18, 2012 by willing
	ITM, I admit I make mistakes. (Preview) I hate making mistakes. I try to do things "right," but when I'm in a mess of my own making, I feel devastated. I used to try to cover up, deny it, or punish myself (before anyone else did). Now, I've a better choice. I practice Step10 & admit it. I made a mistake, but I'm still OK. I accept my i...	lilmzsparkles	0	307	Apr 17, 2012 by lilmzsparkles
	ITM, I know gratitude. (Preview) Negative thinking ran in the family. Whatever the situation, I could imagine the worst outcome. On a sunny day a single cloud meant rain, if called to the office, I'd get fired. At first in CoDA my finances got worse. I imagined being homeless. Then God changed my thinking. I began to look for things to b...	lilmzsparkles	0	415	Apr 16, 2012 by lilmzsparkles
	ITM, I find things I like. (Preview) I lift my head, look around, & see a beautiful fuchsia colour on the cover of a notebook. I like that. I look out the window & see the bright green in some new spring grass. Wow! I like that. I see my children all cozy & asleep, peaceful & trusting. My Higher Power put these little people &a...	lilmzsparkles	0	334	Apr 14, 2012 by lilmzsparkles
	ITM, I am where I need to be. (Preview) Right now, I'm taking a moment to stop my visual pinball reactions to life. I'm pausing to reflect on where I am. I feel my feelings. Gratitude for the tool of self-awareness, knowing I can own my power. I stop to check in with myself & see what's up or what's down. I know it's all OK. If I'm here for myse...	lilmzsparkles	0	338	Apr 14, 2012 by lilmzsparkles
	ITM, I forgive myself. (Preview) After ten years of recovery, I am in pain again. I need to do another Fourth Step inventory. Out comes the pen & paper. Out comes anger, pain, & resentments. And finally, out come some character defects I have worn like armour all my life. How could I be so blind? Talking to my sponsor helps me rea...	lilmzsparkles	0	342	Apr 14, 2012 by lilmzsparkles
	In This Moment, I change the CD. (Preview) Part of me wants to stay in bed. What if I can imagine how it is to wake up happy, joyous & free. Oh! What a gift that would be. Yet here I am just lying here, a little down & tired of the same old same old. Hey! Snap out of it! The sun is coming up, the birds are singing, the breeze is gently rustling the le...	lilmzsparkles	0	359	Apr 14, 2012 by lilmzsparkles
	Listening (Preview) This is another article in the coda newsletter. Apparently it was taken from AA Reviver March 2004. Listening - When I ask you to listen to me, and you start giving advice, you have not done what I asked. - When I ask you to listen and you begin to tell me why I shouldn't feel that wa...	Tracey C	2	425	Apr 13, 2012 by mime
	Recognizing When/If Its Time to Let Go (Preview) Greetings everyone. My mid-teenage daughter is flunking two classes in high school - both are grad pre-requisites. She shrinks when ever presented with a challenge. I've been extremely hard on her about her grades since she was in sixth grade - downright abusive and mean. She won't talk to me ab...	Dr Venkman	8	599	Apr 13, 2012 by mime
	ITM, I'm free to be me. (Preview) When I find myself struggling to be who I am, I think back to when I first came to CoDA. I believed I had no character faults. I grew up being whatever everyone else wanted me to be. I had no sense of who I was. When I read CoDA's patterns of codependency in denial, low self-esteem, & control, I knew I was &...	lilmzsparkles	0	357	Apr 11, 2012 by lilmzsparkles
	ITM, I remind myself "progress, not perfection." (Preview) Doing a 4th Step is like peeling an onion, a layer at a time. Before program, I excused my character defects as "just who I am." I've now worked two 4th Step inventories. Early in recovery, I couldn't see the defects I recognise today. Likewise, there are defects I'm not ready to see today. Th...	lilmzsparkles	0	328	Apr 10, 2012 by lilmzsparkles
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