Miracles In Progress Codependents Anonymous Group - Miracles In Progress Codependents Anonymous Group

willing · willing

This song came out in 1991 and at the time I was 21 and pregnant, the father chosing to have nothing to do with me, and this song said it all. I was heartbroken and terrified. And it has been applicable over and over and over throughout my life. The words confirming the victim I was, a lament to a life fille...

tracy · tracy

Before coda I had no boundaries. Before coda I wanted to plaese others all the time. I wanted to be accepted I could not say no I was naivte believing that all people were good. I was over conscienious, always willing to see another point of view an give them benefit of the doubt make excuses for their nacc...

lilmzsparkles · lilmzsparkles

Some morns I don't want to get up & I don't. I lie in bed, comfy but cheerless. I don't want to start the day. When I have to get up, I stay in bed til the last second. I've followed this pattern since I was a depressed little girl. In this moment, on a spring morning, I'm out of bed! I'm surprised - I'm aware...

lilmzsparkles · lilmzsparkles

I never knew about boundaries until I came into recovery. I had none, but I wanted some. A friend of mine wanted to gossip about someone else's problems. I told her, "That's really none of my business" & changed the subject. My mum asked me to arrange dinner for my ex & our two grown so...

Tracey C · Tracey C

Hi, To help me understand more about codependency I've been looking at other sites. I came across a letter written by a lady who wanted to define it in 25 words or less. To begin her quest she started with what her therapist told her. She said codependency is an obsessive-compulsive disorder. I had n...

willing · willing

I have to tell you that the process of recovery can be so wonderful. At other times it can be so darned painful it is crippling. More will be revealed... I am a very logical person ... too much so. Even in recovery I look at my past and present and say things like "well, that happened and I felt "...

lilmzsparkles · lilmzsparkles

I've heard, "When life gives you lemons, make lemonade." I admire that positive attitude. I've had 'lemons' in my life. When I adopt an attitude of gratitude, they become benefits. I know there is something good for me in all situations. I just need to be aware so I can find it. CoDA Daily Med...

tracy · tracy

Our meeting last night was about feelings. I explained how before recovery i thing I was discoonected from my feelings i do believe this was one of my protect factors (oh my husband has just gamled 40, ooo) well just carry on. Oh my partner has been missing for 3 days he will be back. My parents never mod...

lilmzsparkles · lilmzsparkles

I'm feeling some painful emotions. I know from experience I can survive & come out stronger on the other side. My feelings don't have to make sense or be logical or have a good reason for being. They just are. The first step in making sense of my feelings is to identify them. My part is to be honest &...

lilmzsparkles · lilmzsparkles

Growing up with care-taking & enmeshment, peace at any price, I learned to stuff my feelings. Today, when I'm spoken to in a demeaning or abusive tone, I have choices. I mentally sort out the incident & focus on my responsibility, reaction & feelings. I ask "What is my part? How can I...

lilmzsparkles · lilmzsparkles

Despite being codependent, I'm happy in my own skin. I have friends in the Fellowship who have a great sense of humour & positive outlook on life. They get it. I think that's because they are able to let go & let God. They're good role models for me. I want to see the glass half full. I want to be rid o...

lilmzsparkles · lilmzsparkles

People told their stories of recovery. I heard how my view of life would change by working the Steps. I couldn't see it at first. I slowly began to recognise the obvious recovery of others in my group. I worked the Steps & slowly but surely, I grew. Now I say believing leads to seeing. CoDA Daily Medit...

funny_face · funny_face

Hello all, It's been a while, I've had a good few weeks, met a wonderful man,,, felt wanted and looked after,,,can't say i was perfect, I'm not proud of some of my reactions,,,they still puzzle me. I was quite rude to him at times & lashed out when I felt threatened. It's funny how I felt threatene...

lilmzsparkles · lilmzsparkles

I see spring as a time of rebirth when the whole world seems to have been renewed. New leaves, pretty flowers, & occasional warm days emerge. It's a time to reflect on my life, & the changes I want to make, as I continue growing & healing. I feel energised & renewed. CoDA Daily Meditatio...

Tracey C · Tracey C

Hi All, I found this in a coda newsletter. 1. We admitted that we were powerless over seriousness - that our lives had become unmanageable. 2. Came to believe that only by lightening up could we achieve a state of non-seriousness. 3. Made a decision to turn our constant self-criticism over to ou...

lilmzsparkles · lilmzsparkles

The anniversary of the day my Mum gave birth to me. 35 years of life, emotion, experience, breathes & heartbeats. Of sharing it with you who makes it extra special & who, though life has its ups & downs, I hope is enjoying being here too. Thank you for sharing it with me. I love you all, lilmzx...

lilmzsparkles · lilmzsparkles

I hurt someone's feelings. I felt terrible. Maybe I needed to make amends. I called my sponsor & we discussed it. I also asked my Higher Power for guidance. The answer was clear. Step 9. I made amends & said I was sorry. Doing Step 9 cleared my head. I told myself I wouldn't make the same mistake ag...

InKindergartenAgain · InKindergartenAgain

Now that I have the opportunity in my life to change and make my life better, I am stuck, froze. I have a good job, my own home and some friends, I am healthy and am not in debt. Having finally learned what a co-dependent person I have been, the door is open for me to make some new choices. I have read the sugges...

lilmzsparkles · lilmzsparkles

With nearly every positive statement I make, I add "but." I think I may be afraid to say the negative without first making a positive statement. I may be afraid to say I don't like something, so I sneak it in with a compliment. I've justified this by saying it's more honest to present both side...

willing · willing

... and the funny thing is, not much on the outside has changed. As Codies we tend to strive for perfection and do "too much", so I get my work done, bills paid, house clean, car taken care of ... all that base level, adult responsibility stuff. That doesn't even register in my "life cha...

lilmzsparkles · lilmzsparkles

I was having trouble with my recovery. I hadn't called my sponsor or done any writing lately. I stopped reading recovery books. I felt I wasn't working my program & was ashamed to go to meetings. I remembered Tradition 3: "The only requirement for membership is a desire for healthy & lov...

lilmzsparkles · lilmzsparkles

To understand & love your own body & mind is something everyone should learn You need to use your soul to make it all real & worthwhile & thus, we have our three essential components Everybody needs to feel this way the more you feel the more you are I know it's hard when you see no future,...

lilmzsparkles · lilmzsparkles

As I was sitting in a meeting, slowly feeling better as folks shared, it struck me for the 100th time - how indispensable meetings are. I need them regularly to keep my disease at bay. I need to hear people talking about taking care of themselves, & I need to share my recovery with others. I need to hea...

lilmzsparkles · lilmzsparkles

At my first CoDA meeting, I couldn't understand why all these people were smiling & laughing. Didn't they know life is serious? My problems were overwhelming & I thought recovery had to be serious work. Some people invited me to join them for coffee after the meeting. They poked fun at themse...

lilmzsparkles · lilmzsparkles

I'm learning to let go & it feels good not to be in charge all the time. I have boundless energy to do my will, but often procrastinate on important issues. For too long I hung to the end of a rope with no clear understanding of the meaning of life. Through prayer, I'm redirecting my energy to know &...

lilmzsparkles · lilmzsparkles

Sometimes, I'm not ready. I've learned it's rarely beneficial to wait. procrastination is fear of failure. I ask myself "Fear of what? It's an amends. The response of the other person is irrelevant." I see the only failure is not to. When I feel reluctant, I ask my HP for help. When I ask God f...

willing · willing

I am learning that this is a very big problem for me. People tend to expect others to have the same outlook on life as they do. I think that everyone works as hard, does what they say they are going to do, are honest ... and so forth. I just expect it because I believe that is what I give. I am not a saint, I ma...

lilmzsparkles · lilmzsparkles

Sometimes, I'm not ready. I've learned it's rarely beneficial to wait. procrastination is fear of failure. I ask myself "Fear of what? It's an amends. The response of the other person is irrelevant." I see the only failure is not to. When I feel reluctant, I ask my Higher Power for help. Whe...

lilmzsparkles · lilmzsparkles

When I feel out of control & my stomach is tied in knots, I stop, breathe, & remember I have many tools to handle any situation. I remind myself I am capable of taking care of me. I make good, smart decisions about my life. I trust my Higher Power always provides guidance & direction, help &am...

lilmzsparkles · lilmzsparkles

I am grateful for my life today. When I came into recovery I was newly separated. I was desperate to find someone who could give my life purpose - someone I could take care of, my soulmate. I heard at meetings that recovery meant learning how to take care of me, how to love myself. I didn't have a clue. I neve...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	Celebrating the past (Preview) This song came out in 1991 and at the time I was 21 and pregnant, the father chosing to have nothing to do with me, and this song said it all. I was heartbroken and terrified. And it has been applicable over and over and over throughout my life. The words confirming the victim I was, a lament to a life fille...	willing	0	340	Mar 29, 2012 by willing
	boundaries (Preview) Before coda I had no boundaries. Before coda I wanted to plaese others all the time. I wanted to be accepted I could not say no I was naivte believing that all people were good. I was over conscienious, always willing to see another point of view an give them benefit of the doubt make excuses for their nacc...	tracy	2	646	Mar 29, 2012 by willing
	ITM, my eyes are open. (Preview) Some morns I don't want to get up & I don't. I lie in bed, comfy but cheerless. I don't want to start the day. When I have to get up, I stay in bed til the last second. I've followed this pattern since I was a depressed little girl. In this moment, on a spring morning, I'm out of bed! I'm surprised - I'm aware...	lilmzsparkles	1	390	Mar 29, 2012 by tracy
	In This Moment, I set boundaries. (Preview) I never knew about boundaries until I came into recovery. I had none, but I wanted some. A friend of mine wanted to gossip about someone else's problems. I told her, "That's really none of my business" & changed the subject. My mum asked me to arrange dinner for my ex & our two grown so...	lilmzsparkles	0	375	Mar 27, 2012 by lilmzsparkles
	Understanding Codependency (Preview) Hi, To help me understand more about codependency I've been looking at other sites. I came across a letter written by a lady who wanted to define it in 25 words or less. To begin her quest she started with what her therapist told her. She said codependency is an obsessive-compulsive disorder. I had n...	Tracey C	1	550	Mar 28, 2012 by Darlene Lancer MFT
	Digging deeper (Preview) I have to tell you that the process of recovery can be so wonderful. At other times it can be so darned painful it is crippling. More will be revealed... I am a very logical person ... too much so. Even in recovery I look at my past and present and say things like "well, that happened and I felt "...	willing	0	380	Mar 27, 2012 by willing
	ITM, I'm making lemonade. (Preview) I've heard, "When life gives you lemons, make lemonade." I admire that positive attitude. I've had 'lemons' in my life. When I adopt an attitude of gratitude, they become benefits. I know there is something good for me in all situations. I just need to be aware so I can find it. CoDA Daily Med...	lilmzsparkles	0	355	Mar 27, 2012 by lilmzsparkles
	feelings (Preview) Our meeting last night was about feelings. I explained how before recovery i thing I was discoonected from my feelings i do believe this was one of my protect factors (oh my husband has just gamled 40, ooo) well just carry on. Oh my partner has been missing for 3 days he will be back. My parents never mod...	tracy	1	375	Mar 27, 2012 by lilmzsparkles
	ITM, my feelings just are. (Preview) I'm feeling some painful emotions. I know from experience I can survive & come out stronger on the other side. My feelings don't have to make sense or be logical or have a good reason for being. They just are. The first step in making sense of my feelings is to identify them. My part is to be honest &...	lilmzsparkles	0	344	Mar 26, 2012 by lilmzsparkles
	In This Moment, I speak up. (Preview) Growing up with care-taking & enmeshment, peace at any price, I learned to stuff my feelings. Today, when I'm spoken to in a demeaning or abusive tone, I have choices. I mentally sort out the incident & focus on my responsibility, reaction & feelings. I ask "What is my part? How can I...	lilmzsparkles	0	379	Mar 25, 2012 by lilmzsparkles
	ITM, I'm a happy codependent. (Preview) Despite being codependent, I'm happy in my own skin. I have friends in the Fellowship who have a great sense of humour & positive outlook on life. They get it. I think that's because they are able to let go & let God. They're good role models for me. I want to see the glass half full. I want to be rid o...	lilmzsparkles	0	405	Mar 24, 2012 by lilmzsparkles
	In This Moment, I see & believe. (Preview) People told their stories of recovery. I heard how my view of life would change by working the Steps. I couldn't see it at first. I slowly began to recognise the obvious recovery of others in my group. I worked the Steps & slowly but surely, I grew. Now I say believing leads to seeing. CoDA Daily Medit...	lilmzsparkles	1	396	Mar 24, 2012 by willing
	My trip- Triggers (Preview) Hello all, It's been a while, I've had a good few weeks, met a wonderful man,,, felt wanted and looked after,,,can't say i was perfect, I'm not proud of some of my reactions,,,they still puzzle me. I was quite rude to him at times & lashed out when I felt threatened. It's funny how I felt threatene...	funny_face	2	502	Mar 22, 2012 by funny_face
	In This Moment, I enjoy spring. (Preview) I see spring as a time of rebirth when the whole world seems to have been renewed. New leaves, pretty flowers, & occasional warm days emerge. It's a time to reflect on my life, & the changes I want to make, as I continue growing & healing. I feel energised & renewed. CoDA Daily Meditatio...	lilmzsparkles	1	395	Mar 22, 2012 by willing
	The Twelve Steps to Regaining A Sense Of Humour (Preview) Hi All, I found this in a coda newsletter. 1. We admitted that we were powerless over seriousness - that our lives had become unmanageable. 2. Came to believe that only by lightening up could we achieve a state of non-seriousness. 3. Made a decision to turn our constant self-criticism over to ou...	Tracey C	2	475	Mar 22, 2012 by lilmzsparkles
	In This Moment, I'm celebrating my birthday. (Preview) The anniversary of the day my Mum gave birth to me. 35 years of life, emotion, experience, breathes & heartbeats. Of sharing it with you who makes it extra special & who, though life has its ups & downs, I hope is enjoying being here too. Thank you for sharing it with me. I love you all, lilmzx...	lilmzsparkles	4	380	Mar 22, 2012 by lilmzsparkles
	In This Moment, I feel relieved. (Preview) I hurt someone's feelings. I felt terrible. Maybe I needed to make amends. I called my sponsor & we discussed it. I also asked my Higher Power for guidance. The answer was clear. Step 9. I made amends & said I was sorry. Doing Step 9 cleared my head. I told myself I wouldn't make the same mistake ag...	lilmzsparkles	0	355	Mar 21, 2012 by lilmzsparkles
	Seems To Me I Should Be Somewhat Happy Now (Preview) Now that I have the opportunity in my life to change and make my life better, I am stuck, froze. I have a good job, my own home and some friends, I am healthy and am not in debt. Having finally learned what a co-dependent person I have been, the door is open for me to make some new choices. I have read the sugges...	InKindergartenAgain	2	390	Mar 21, 2012 by willing
	In This Moment, I strive for clarity. (Preview) With nearly every positive statement I make, I add "but." I think I may be afraid to say the negative without first making a positive statement. I may be afraid to say I don't like something, so I sneak it in with a compliment. I've justified this by saying it's more honest to present both side...	lilmzsparkles	0	342	Mar 21, 2012 by lilmzsparkles
	I couldn't even imagine this life ... (Preview) ... and the funny thing is, not much on the outside has changed. As Codies we tend to strive for perfection and do "too much", so I get my work done, bills paid, house clean, car taken care of ... all that base level, adult responsibility stuff. That doesn't even register in my "life cha...	willing	2	621	Mar 18, 2012 by Tracey C
	ITM, I'm worthy of recovery. (Preview) I was having trouble with my recovery. I hadn't called my sponsor or done any writing lately. I stopped reading recovery books. I felt I wasn't working my program & was ashamed to go to meetings. I remembered Tradition 3: "The only requirement for membership is a desire for healthy & lov...	lilmzsparkles	0	381	Mar 16, 2012 by lilmzsparkles
	Self Belief poem (Preview) To understand & love your own body & mind is something everyone should learn You need to use your soul to make it all real & worthwhile & thus, we have our three essential components Everybody needs to feel this way the more you feel the more you are I know it's hard when you see no future,...	lilmzsparkles	4	663	Mar 16, 2012 by lilmzsparkles
	In This Moment, I need meetings. (Preview) As I was sitting in a meeting, slowly feeling better as folks shared, it struck me for the 100th time - how indispensable meetings are. I need them regularly to keep my disease at bay. I need to hear people talking about taking care of themselves, & I need to share my recovery with others. I need to hea...	lilmzsparkles	0	412	Mar 15, 2012 by lilmzsparkles
	ITM, I don't take myself so seriously. (Preview) At my first CoDA meeting, I couldn't understand why all these people were smiling & laughing. Didn't they know life is serious? My problems were overwhelming & I thought recovery had to be serious work. Some people invited me to join them for coffee after the meeting. They poked fun at themse...	lilmzsparkles	0	359	Mar 13, 2012 by lilmzsparkles
	ITM, I follow God's will for me. (Preview) I'm learning to let go & it feels good not to be in charge all the time. I have boundless energy to do my will, but often procrastinate on important issues. For too long I hung to the end of a rope with no clear understanding of the meaning of life. Through prayer, I'm redirecting my energy to know &...	lilmzsparkles	0	416	Mar 11, 2012 by lilmzsparkles
	ITM, I ask my HP for the willingness to make amends. (Preview) Sometimes, I'm not ready. I've learned it's rarely beneficial to wait. procrastination is fear of failure. I ask myself "Fear of what? It's an amends. The response of the other person is irrelevant." I see the only failure is not to. When I feel reluctant, I ask my HP for help. When I ask God f...	lilmzsparkles	0	616	Mar 11, 2012 by lilmzsparkles
	Expectations are Resentments Waiting to Happen (Preview) I am learning that this is a very big problem for me. People tend to expect others to have the same outlook on life as they do. I think that everyone works as hard, does what they say they are going to do, are honest ... and so forth. I just expect it because I believe that is what I give. I am not a saint, I ma...	willing	1	2612	Mar 11, 2012 by lilmzsparkles
	ITM, I ask my HP for the willingness to make amends. (Preview) Sometimes, I'm not ready. I've learned it's rarely beneficial to wait. procrastination is fear of failure. I ask myself "Fear of what? It's an amends. The response of the other person is irrelevant." I see the only failure is not to. When I feel reluctant, I ask my Higher Power for help. Whe...	lilmzsparkles	0	344	Mar 10, 2012 by lilmzsparkles
	ITM, I choose to take care of myself. (Preview) When I feel out of control & my stomach is tied in knots, I stop, breathe, & remember I have many tools to handle any situation. I remind myself I am capable of taking care of me. I make good, smart decisions about my life. I trust my Higher Power always provides guidance & direction, help &am...	lilmzsparkles	0	373	Mar 9, 2012 by lilmzsparkles
	ITM, I learn the most important thing. (Preview) I am grateful for my life today. When I came into recovery I was newly separated. I was desperate to find someone who could give my life purpose - someone I could take care of, my soulmate. I heard at meetings that recovery meant learning how to take care of me, how to love myself. I didn't have a clue. I neve...	lilmzsparkles	0	364	Mar 8, 2012 by lilmzsparkles
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